Throwback Thursday: ‘A Discussion of Keats’s Negative Capability’ by Susan Pieters

As I breathe in her presence, smoke fills my lungs. It is the incense she burns to her own gods; they are not my gods, and I resist her already. I am on guard to defend myself against her, futile as it is, as if I could breathe carefully around the smoke, or not breathe at all.

Sitting on the matted shag carpet near her footstool is safest. She cannot see me well here. I appear meek. I am not being deceptive; it is an honest attitude I have towards my mother — I do respect her. But it’s also not respect. I am caught in between.

See what I mean.

She says nothing, but acknowledges me with her look, like a cat surmising the approach and settling of a tolerated dog. She wants me to be here, though. I know this. She too is caught.

“How was your day?” I ask. Her days are all the same and it’s an artificial question. It cements the few feet of distance between us and secures my place on the floor.

Fine, she mumbles, or did she only nod? I am not sure, so tuned in to her thoughts as I am.  I know she is not fine; she cannot see well, and it’s hard for her to speak. The doctors say things are not likely to improve.

“What do you think of this quote, Mom?” I open up my textbook to the marked page. I’ve spent much of my morning planning this little conversation piece, nearly memorizing the lines so I can have something to talk about with her.  

“Keats’s theory of negative capability ascribes to the artist a unique ability to see into another person. Through this gift of ‘becoming negative’,’ that is, erasing one’s self, the artist can virtually become another person, understanding the other’s thoughts and emotions with perhaps even greater clarity than the person himself. It is this gift of insight which the artist later transforms into poetry or prose.“